Winds of Change

<-Feeling it!

Another weekend has come and gone. I realize that not every moment of every day can be uplifting...hopeful...positive and shiny....

I spent most of the weekend in a strange funk! I couldn't rise above it or talk myself out of it or shake myself out of it for anything! Even having the eldest come in for her 21st birthday wasn't enough to drag me from the depths of doldrums. A pervasive melancholy. And I think that its roots rode the along the lines of expectations (damn them!) Expecting and hoping. Or in layman's terms: setting myself up for disappointment.
SIGH....

Sure, I smiled...laughed at the appropriate moments (some inappropriate too), but it was such an effort! And really?
Nothing HUGE was wrong in my world. Matter of fact, from the outside looking in it looked pretty damn good!

"How's it going?" I was asked. "PEACHY," I replied, forced smile pulled up tight.

Do you guys find yourself in similar straits?

Now I realize that by asking, the folks that have said SURE! to blogging are, for all practical purposes, walking on clouds in life at the moment! Not to say there aren't some "Bleh" aspects to life, but lets face it: when you're in a new relationship and all the cylinders are firing off in harmony and unity - not much can serve to bring you down! :) And that is as it should be!! And I'm VERY happy for you guys as you both deserve some unlimited sunshiney happiness!! Sort of inspirational, really.
I miss that. But don't worry...its not adding to any funk! I can be happy for your joy while still riding the wave of melancholy.

And for the record? I realize its just feelings and that being the transient things they are...they pass into yesterday!

Which brings me full circle! :) Another weekend has come and gone...and if I lay my head down-quiet my heart's funk-close my eyes and sink into blissful dreaming...then it will be a new day, a new week, and an opportunity to do it better than before!